Millennials (yep, I'm going there), are culturally perceived to be lazy, but more and more research is showing that people in this age group are working harder, spinning their wheels earlier and longer, than other generations (see facebook meme a-aaaaaa, as example).
We as a whole are out to improve the world. As the Harvard Business Review article below states, millennials do not value vacation time, often choosing the statement, "No one can do my work as well as I do" as a comment on why vacations are on the decline. Is this a deep seeded remnant of arrogance? Or, have we simply come to believe what we've been told: "Become the best, so that you can't be replaced."
Maybe I see this more than others because I am in a profession that is solidly planted in entrepreneurship. Burn out is for REAL in my world; it is an actual threat to the survive/thrive plan. So, what does this ideology have to do with birth?
We, you, they, whatever you want to read, are over-achievers. My people, my crowd, my soul sisters and brothers are the Hermione Grangers of the world. I fancy myself more of a Ron, but at the end of the day I'm intellectually one of the laziest of my friends....and I am a HARD worker. This lends itself to smart people with a lot of promise, burning out way too soon. They burn out because their soul kissing dreams are intangible. Words like "success" and "financial freedom" float around, just outside of grasp because they are indefinite. Here's where birth comes in.
Different organizations surrounding birth have created guidelines of what is acceptable in the progression of normal pregnancy, and this amplifies in birth. In pregnancy you should measure a certain way, blood pressure should stay within a certain range, blood and urine analysis should show markers of health, weight gain has its own parameters, and fetal heart rate has a window of acceptable findings. Any variance from these numbers will inevitably involve some element of intervention. Sometimes this intervention is mild, like bed rest. Other times, the end result is a shell shocked new mom with a 24 week gestation baby, or worse. This is in no way to insinuate that medical intervention is unnecessary. I am quite literally the product of medical technology; if not for NICU services, I most likely wouldn't be alive.
In birth, there are Bishop Scores, APGAR scores, statistical rates of advancement, and other markers that indicate necessary intervention. Here is the problem: time is changing these parameters. As overachievers we want to be perfect. Ne'er you mind the mom who smoked throughout her pregnancy in the 60's, moms now avoid flying due to radiation exposure and avoid deli meats all in an attempt to give their baby the best start possible. These moms and dads are changing their whole lives from the day of conception (or possible conception) out of love to the be the best for their children as possible. This is parenting. This is love and sacrifice from day one. Healthcare professionals tend to want to focus on objective parameters, and that is great! Generally, though, we aim to impose the statistical norms and that takes the control out of mama and daddy's hands, and places them in an algorithm. I am a huge fan of Improvingbirth.org. I want the birth world to be over flowing with research! But at the end of the day, if a mom is comfortable birthing at home, she should, unless absolutely unavoidable circumstances arise, be at home. If a mom is comfortable in a hospital, with every monitor and doo-hicky attached to her, she should be there.
We can not turn birth in to a race. We can't turn it into a talent show where someone loses. When we do that, competition and self-depreciation become the name of the game and no one, especially that new family unit, will benefit. No matter where a woman labors and delivers, when she meets the eyes of her little one, there should be no room for anything but absolute adulation. The target should be that look. The target is that smile, or sob, or throwing heads back, or hugs, or whatever, but it should be ideal in the eyes of mom and dad. Ideal doesn't mean without a hitch, it doesn't mean a baby born in the caul in a tranquil water birth, it doesn't mean sans stretch mark, it doesn't mean measuring exactly 35 cm at 35 weeks. It means, at the end of the day, Mom and dad (insert any birth partner and their relationship to mom), know that they have done what was best from their own knowledge base.
Harvard business Review article about the work-a-holic-millennials
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